Surgery done!

Yesterday, the surgery was complete!  Now I recover. I can already tell the results will be amazing. There are parts of my body I haven’t seen in years.

The surgeon removed a SIX POUND skin flap from my abdomen. ( It looked like a stingray in the photo he sent)  additionally, he removed 5 lbs during liposuction.  What a way to lose 11 lbs.  Diet and exercise is much much cheaper, way way easier, and way way less painful.

But you can’t exercise or diet skin off your body.

The surgical binder covers much of my belly, but what I can see is beautifully flat. It’s swollen to be sure, bruised and bloody, stitched up and taped up. But it’s already gorgeous to me!!


It’s getting down to the wire

This time to, I’ll be in surgery. Not getting naked, marked and prepped… But actually *in* surgery!

I have a lot to do to finish getting ready. I go back and forth between being happy and excited… To being nervous and anxious.

Gotta clean, shop, make food and stay calm.

Happy Memorial Day.  Let’s never forget those who paid the ultimate sacrifice.


None of those things happened

Sometimes I just don’t get anything crossed off my to-do list.  I busied myself with cleaning and organizing, and preparing to be out of commission for awhile, but anything paperwork related, I bailed on completely.

Since there is a holiday weekend, today will be my last business day to take care of these things.  /sigh /

I’m getting nervous and excited. Three days and a wakeup…  It’ll be here (and done) before I know it.  Largely and in
general people have been supportive. (most notably about quitting smoking! Lol)  but many people are deeply concerned about two things… The risks of complications and the pain of recovery. 
Oh… There was a 22-second period where I didn’t think of that? Thanks for reminding me. 😛
It’s all good, though. I’m sure everything will be fine. And I’ll have narcotics.


Four days and a wakeup

It’s surprisingly Thursday… Out of nowhere! As I calculate how little time remains until surgery, the realization sets in that I simply won’t be able to get it all done. Now I triage.

I need to file some court documents (thanks ex husband, I know you couldn’t wait to be done paying child support… It’s cool… Just pay me the rest you have owed on braces… For 18 months).  Since I will be two days post-op, I won’t be able to attend the hearing.  So I have to get my stuff filed asap.

Why haven’t I paid for the license sticker renewal for the van? Is been impaled by a push pin in the family command center board for at least five weeks… Hanging there… Not getting paid. I think I’m resistant to giving the State of Illinois ANY more money. Oh wait… They sign my paychecks. Ugh.
Whatever. That gets done today.

Online class. That needs major work. I’ve got to get all my ducks in row, because something tells me two and half weeks after surgery, I won’t be nearly motivated as I am right now.

I detest paperwork.



My emotions are all over the place. I feel like crying.  I want a carton of cigarettes.  Fuck cigs.  I hate them. I never want to see another cigarette. I miss them. But I don’t.  I’m nervous.  I’m so excited for surgery. I’m devastated how much weight I’ve gained so quickly. I’m determined to get back with the Furhman style eating tomorrow. I’m terrified, angry, fussy, sad, lonely, and irritated. I’m sleepy, anxious and having trouble getting out of my own headspace.  I want to laugh. I want to have sex. I want to cry. A lot.  I feel like if I could just release all the stress (and not by putting another bite of food in my damned mouth!!! Grrr)… I’d feel better.
I simply want to feel better.

8 days until surgery.


Few things as funny

… As my BFF, L,  when she’s had a few drinks. I’m curled up in the cuddler (a piece of upholstered furniture… Bigger than a chair and a half, smaller than a loveseat), waiting on my coffee to finish brewing, and I’m still giggling just thinking about how she cracked me up last night.

The best joke of the night (which will pale in my retelling, so just trust me… It was fucking hilarious)… After a few margaritas and bodies moving around the kitchen, I got super hot… And I asked L confidentially if she thought I could get away with taking off the sweatshirt I’d been using to hide my muffin top/ love handles. I unzipped a little too show her… She made the face I make when I say “Aww, pumpkin….”  in reference to someone who is SO clueless, they don’t even comprehend how ridiculous their question is (and how obvious the answer is).

Then she said… “You should probably just open a window” , I about lost my mind laughing. We both did. (Damn, it’s good to have her back after a long week of her visiting family, etc)

I can’t wait to use recovery time for other beauty purposes… L &  I are going to photo document our faces while using a specific brand of facial skin rejuvenation product (no spoilers!!) and then see about morphing each daily photo into an awesome gif that shows the difference using the product makes.
I’m also going to try castor oil and emu oil on my hair to try to bring back some hair follicles, if that’s even possible. I’ve heard great things. I’ve lived with super fine hair my whole life, and in my twenties, it got really thin as a result of taking some medication. (I literally lost like half of my hair).  I’ve been taking biotin for surgery prep anyway, so I should at least have stronger nails soon, if nothing else.  I’m hoping that I’ll have improved results not only with a super flat tummy, but also gorgeous hair, and flawless skin. (a girl can dream, can’t she??)

I can’t wait to be able to take off a layer without embarrassment!!

5 days, 9 hours and 22 minutes since my last cigarette!!!


Baby’s Graduation

My first baby graduates in just over an hour. His BCT graduation was more impressive, but we’re still proud of him. He can’t wait to move on to AIT.

Skyped my surgeon today. I’ve never been more convinced he’s the right man for the job. 

Ten days and a wakeup!